Paul. Taking Things Too Literally

For those of you that are not aware, I am repeating past blogs to catch you up again to continue this story. 

It is hard enough as a child and teenager to cope with the daily struggles of life let alone dealing with everything I was going through. How did I survive?

I think by the grace of God I survived. I don't want to turn you off with religious jargon but I can only contribute my survival to God. Things got pretty difficult and without that hope and belief in a higher being, I truly do not think I would have survived.

I was a pretty quiet person and still can be until you get to know me. I journaled a ton and fell asleep to music often crying myself to sleep. I felt very alone and isolated.

My other brother Chris was heading to Toronto every weekend at this time and so he really didn't have to deal with Paul's antics. Eventually Chris moved to Toronto so when Paul was smoking marijuana in the apartment Chris wasn't even around.

Thankfully, I met the right people at the right time to encourage me to keep going.

I was very involved with my church. There was an awesome youth group that I went too. I was pretty quiet about everything until the dam broke. I started to talk to people about what was going on and then I felt such relief that I couldn't stop myself.

So about Paul... I truly cannot remember how long it was that he was gone for. But talking about taking the bible literally...

My mother got a phone call from St. Michael's Hospital in Toronto. Paul presented to the emergency room with pain in his eye. He wasn't concerned about what he had done to himself but he was concerned that he might have an eye infection.


...if you are faint of heart you may want to skip this part.

Paul took his pupil out with a screwdriver. Yes, you read correctly...his pupil. I was told that he was walking around with his eye in hand for a couple of weeks prior to going to the hospital. His eye was replaced with a glass eye and he was classified legally blind.

****************************** End of warning! *****************************

He was obviously admitted to the hospital. He was diagnosed with schizophrenia where he had many shock treatments. My mom went to visit him in the hospital but I just couldn't bring myself to go and see him. But still life continued....