Caring too much?

This is not the life I tried to make for myself and my kids! The speech delays, the developmental delays and the obvious challenges that come with the parenting.

I had a friend that told me that she was missing the carefree Ann. And the people these days that I know wouldn't even know that Ann. Don't you think that I miss that Ann too? Don't you think that my kids deserve to know that Ann too?

Is this the challenge set before us to live the joyful life? Not a life about happiness but filled with joy...despite the circumstances...filled with joy.

I like to think that I don't care about what others think however I think that I care far too much about what others think. Wish that we were able to separate ourselves from others. Where does that desire come from? Why does it matter what others think about us? Are we defined by what others think of us? Are we any less of a person if we don't measure up to their measuring stick? Where does that measuring instrument come from anyways?